


seam ripper

by kogaritsu



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: But only a little, Character Study, Gen, hbd shu!!!!, there was more but then i got sad so now its just this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-08 07:22:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21231971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kogaritsu/pseuds/kogaritsu
Summary: For someone with an ice cold demeanor, Shu’s hands were warm like the sun shining on freshly fallen snow. They were steady and secure once, but shook now under the weight of both responsibility and paranoia. His fingernails, one manicured and maintained, were mangled by teeth and skin, blood stuck beneath one like flecks of dirt. Dextrous joints were now stiff, capped by vaguely discolored knuckles. Sewing calluses were irritated to the brink of cracking, soothed by nothing and ever stinging at the slightest flex of palm. In spite of everything, though, they were still warm.





	seam ripper

**Author's Note:**

> was at work all day and have a meeting in the morning so this is all i cld do :(

For someone with an ice cold demeanor, Shu’s hands were warm like the sun shining on freshly fallen snow. They were steady and secure once, but shook now under the weight of both responsibility and paranoia. His fingernails, one manicured and maintained, were mangled by teeth and skin, blood stuck beneath one like flecks of dirt. Dextrous joints were now stiff, capped by vaguely discolored knuckles. Sewing calluses were irritated to the brink of cracking, soothed by nothing and ever stinging at the slightest flex of palm. In spite of everything, though, they were still warm.

Rei’s hands, in an act of ironic romanticism, were cold to the touch. No exposure to sunlight nor brush of contact with warmth could banish the ice that clung to his skin. The burden of his own responsibility did them no favors, kissing the joints with aches and the curve of his right wrist with an everlasting stress cramp. They were musicians' hands, long fingered and wide palmed, callused at his fingertips from years of violin. His were often chewed at, constantly irritated and sore but not often on the verge of cracking open. 

Calloused as his hands were, he was truly gifted when it came to instruments of the stringed variety. Shu hated to appear starstruck in public, mastering the art of a blank face when admiring the arts in person. He wasn’t always successful, facade falling when faced by raw talent, but he liked to think he had a 70% success rate. It was a work in progress, though not his main concern.

“Your violin would like you much more if you were gentler with her.” Shu was empty handed for once, sewing set aside and Mademoiselle lain against the pillows on the parlor sofa. 

“My violin loves me,” Rei preened, juggling his bow between his thumb and ring finger, “I know her better than anyone.”

Charmed, but only that once, Shu laughed behind his hand. If he could frame a feeling, the careless joy he felt when watching his friends perform would be hung behind his staircase. The thought kept a smile on his face, and he didn’t care enough to change his expression.

“What’s goin’ on in there?” Rei’s forefinger tapped Shu’s temple hair blocking his view of the lamp on the end table.

Shu shook his head, pushing Rei’s shoulder until he moved away, “You’re just amusing, Rei.”

Rei smiled too, then, tucked his hair behind his ear and regripping his violin, content to play the night away.

\---

Kanata had long complained about the temperature of the onsen, but even he melted into the hot water after a bit of adjustment. His hair floated like a seafoam halo, face flushed from the heat and eyes lidded with sleepiness. Even then, at his most unguarded and open, Shu could see why his family considered him a living god; whether or not he approved of the way Kanata was treated at home. In situations like that, there was just nothing to be done, however, regardless of how much it stung. 

At least they had each other. It wasn’t ideal, nor was it perfect, but Shu liked to hope that it was enough for Kanata. Even if they were all hurting too much to work through it together.

“This ‘hurt’,” Kanata’s fingers brushed over Shu’s heart, cool and soothing, “Is not the ‘lonely’ kind, is it?”

“No.” It was an involuntary response, drawn out by the swirling of green irises that Shu was positive he was imagining.

“‘Please’ do not ‘shut us’ out.” Palm resting on the place where his heart beat against his skin, Kanata was suddenly close enough for his breathe to fan across Shu’s cheek. 

Nose to nose, Shu’s right hand was guided up to feel Kanata’s heart as well, beating healthy and steady in his chest. There was certainly pain in the smile that migrated to the curve of Shu’s cheek, but it stayed below the surface, rippling without showing its face. Unsure of how to feel, Shu buried his axe in relief, leaning into Kanata’s grasp and exhaling a breath closer to a sob. 

“You ‘are not’ alone, as long as ‘we’ are with ‘you’, Shu.” Kanata’s mouth was at his ear, speaking softly enough for the sounds to get lost in the water around them, “I’ll ‘hold us’ above water ‘until’ you’re ready to ‘let me go’.” 

It was all Shu could do to not come apart then and there. Clinging to Kanata’s sides with the urgency of a man caught in a riptide, he let himself be held as if he were sea glass. Kanata was like an anchor, keeping both of them grounded, and Shu had scarcely been so grateful in his life. Steam rose around them, shielding them from the other students lingering around and giving him the privacy to shed a few tears. 

Distantly, he wondered where Kanata learned to be so nurturing.

**Author's Note:**

> honk if you sensed my madakana crumbs that i added as i transferred the words over to ao3


End file.
